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Things I Want To Do And See At Star Trek London

Its one week away to go.  Yes Star Trek London is closing in faster than an unstable worm hole in the Delta Quadrant.  Its being held at the Excel 19th to 21st October and its going to be huge.  Anyway I will be there reporting for the Saturday and Sunday (Yep! They have agreed to give me a press pass the fools) and here are some things I want to see or do (if I'm brave enough!)

1 - Get William Shatner to sing a little bit of Tambourine Man.
2 - Shout may the force be with you in the middle of a crowd and survive to write about it.
3 - Ask Scott Bakula why he hasn't jumped yet.
4 - Drink some Romulan Ale
5 - Argue with a Klingon
6 - Test how good the first aiders are (see above)
7 - Ask Jeffrey Combs if he has his lead vest on (Frighteners)
8 - See if Robert O'Reilly's eyes are really that wide
9 - Find someone dressed in a red shirt and tell them to be careful.
10 - Guess correctly what colour Ira Steven Behr's beard is.  (I'm going for red.)
11 - See if anyone has come as the skin of evil (will get a photo)
12 - Get assimilated by a Borg (will get a photo if I survive.)
13 - Get at least four people to sing the ballad of Bilbo Baggins with me.
14 - Get someone famous to sign my costume.  (Yes I am dressing up.  Enterprise jumpsuit.)
15 - Ask Chase Masterson at the party to give me Umox
16 - See if I can get back into the party (see above)
17 - Get someone to wear a fake moustache and do a Scotty impression.
18 - Tell Rene Auberjoinois that I really enjoyed Police Academy 5 and regard it as my favourite movie (this of course is not true.  Jaws 4 is my favourite movie.)
19 - See someone dressed up as a Star Wars character and ask them if they are lost.
20 - Shout Khaaaannn!!! on the Enterprise bridge mock up.
21 - Buy a Niners baseball cap.
22 - See if I can sell someone to a Ferengi for 5 bars of gold press latinum.
23 - Ask Michael Dorn if he's a merry man.
24 - See if Brent Spiner uses contractions or determine if he just talks that way.
25 - Help break the world record for most visitors in a Star Trek costume.
26 - See if anyone has come (or remembers) Doctor Pulaski.
27 - Find someone who actually thinks the Voyager episode Threshold is one of their favourites.
28 - Have another Romulan Ale.
29 - Find someone with a flute who is playing Picard's tune from The Inner Light.
30 - Tell Patrick Stewart that I thought his performance in the film Lifeforce was very moving and true to life.
31 - Demand the SFX team cover Sherlock in their magazine. (Great magazine though.)
32 - Find the best costume and post it on here.
33 - Have a Romulan Ale
34 - Drink a Warp Core Breach
35 - Drink some Aldebaran whiskey
36 - Drink some Synthale
37 - Seek out some Vidians and ask for a new liver (see above)
38 - Congratulate Andrew Robinson on what a fine book A Stitch In Time is.
39 - Eat some gak
40 - Find the nearest toilets (see above)
41 - Order a ractageno every time I want a coffee.
42 - Find a celebrity Star Trek fan.

Hope they still let me in if they read this.

Really looking forward to the event and will keep you posted throughout the two days I am there.  There are likely to be a lot of photos and a few of me embarrassing myself.

Rob Wainfur
The Bearded Trio

I need your Star Wars memories for a book


  1. Hilarious. I'm looking forward to the follow up. :D


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